Brain Jail
You have the key
I had finally done it. In mid-October of 2023, I launched the first-ever episode of my Lawyers in the Making Podcast. I had posted about it on LinkedIn, my Lawyers in the Making Instagram account, and finally, I was going to post it on my personal Instagram. I had already posted it on my podcast’s Instagram story, so putting it on my personal story would literally be copy and paste.
I had just finished my early afternoon class and began heading to my car. At the end of class, I had put up the LinkedIn post and the Instagram post on my podcast page. The only part left was to put it on my personal story. It’s as easy as clicking the post button. I was about to do it during class, but suddenly felt a wave of worry and anxiety. I quickly put my phone away and continued listening to my music. On my way to the car, I had set it all up on my story, and all I had to do was click post. One move of my hand and it would all be over. I arrived at my car, sat down, took a look at my phone… and couldn’t do it. Wave after wave, my mind was spiraling out of control. I thought about all the people I knew in my hometown, and what they would think. I didn’t even tell most of my friends that I was starting a podcast.
I had changed so much up to that point, from my Senior year of high school to this day, my Junior year of college. In high school, I was wild, rambunctious, and to most people’s perception, they would say, “This guy is screwed.” But were they wrong? Absolutely not. Then I arrived at college and had a complete reinvention of myself. I started reading books, working out consistently, and changed drastically as a person. Now I was going to start a podcast and present it to the world.
30 minutes later, I was still sitting in my car. I didn’t even manage to turn the car on. Frozen, stuck like a tongue on a cold pole, all I could think about was what people were gonna say. “He’s a nerd, that’s so uncool of him, who would start a stupid podcast, he’s not even a lawyer!” Finally, in a split second, I was able to get control over the whirlwind in my head. I thought back to before my first-ever episode. The nervousness and the panicked state I was in. It was happening again. I realized in that moment that all the feelings I felt were a pattern I’ve faced before. It meant to me that all the discomfort was because this podcast was going to work out for me. Finally, after what felt like years in my car, I clicked post. What happened next won’t shock you, reading this, or me, as I write it today, but it shocked me in that car more than anything.
The outpouring of support was unfathomable. People I hadn’t spoken to in years were reaching out to me, telling me about how awesome this new podcast was. Later that day, I laughed hard. I couldn’t believe it took me so long to press the post button. The messages showed me that those 30 minutes in that car, I had locked myself in an unpenetrable jail cell. The funny part was that I had the key to get out the whole time.
That is what they call brain jail.
Well, folks, that’s from me, Nate Crespo, your host for today, and FOREVER. Missed a week, so a double article drop this week to keep the consistency. As always,
Happy Monday!